Theme parks can be overwhelming for everyone, but for those with disabilities and their families, it can be a daunting task.
Having a daughter with a Down syndrome diagnosis, I know this all too well. We have visited a few theme parks over the last 15 years, and while most experiences have been good, fewer have been positive as she has gotten older. However, on this day at this theme park, I cried. I can be emotional sometimes, but I didn’t expect it to happen in public like it did.
A few weeks ago, we decided to take a weekend and head to Legoland. We had gone when the kids were small, but our son really wanted to go again. We tried to prepare as best we could and debated whether or not to take our daughter’s stroller, as she does get tired, and it is sometimes helpful when behaviors arise. She’s sweet but also sassy and stubborn. In the end, we decided not to. We knew we would do the park and the water park and wanted to avoid her sitting all day as she would absolutely take advantage of it.
I was so stressed thinking about how it would go and what obstacles we might face throughout our day. We got her a disability pass that works similarly to a fast pass. They typically give you a time, and you come back at that time to avoid waiting in line. The park has many different sections, each offering its own attractions. While the park is relatively small compared to other theme parks, it was spread out enough that every line had waits under 40 minutes. So instead of getting a time to come back, we were allowed to just walk right on or wait 15 minutes at the most. The staff was so kind and accommodating, and it made the worry of what was to come fall off my shoulders.
Little did I know, a core memory was about to be made for all of us. Legoland offers a driving school for children ages 6-13. The track is an adorable little city with Lego cars. Although she’s 15, she is very short, so she easily passed for under 13. I asked my son, who is 12, if he wanted to do it as well, and he said no. He is very tall for his age and knew he would be squished. Adults were not permitted to ride, and I was incredibly nervous about her being on the track without one of us to jump in if needed. We watched the kids on the ride and realized the cars didn’t go fast, and I thought, let’s just let her try it. We don’t know until we try.
With our disability pass, we went right to the front of the line. The staff worker asked if she might need my assistance getting settled, and I replied that she would. He let us go first and explained to both of us which pedal was for gas and which was for the brake. Once she was ready, he let everyone else on. Myself, my husband, and our son held our breath. I silently wondered if I should go get her off, wondered if I had made a mistake. But before I could, the cars turned on, and she pressed on the gas pedal.
You guys…our girl, who had never driven anything by herself, drove herself all over the track with the biggest smile on her face. I noted the employee who discreetly walked the track in case he was needed, took a deep breath, and allowed myself to be in the moment. I smiled through the tears. We cheered, and the other parents cheered with their own tear-lined eyes. My son said, “She’s driving, she’s actually driving! And doing it well.” She stayed in the correct lane, went around the roundabout several times, and never ran into any other cars.
When the ride finished, the employee came over and asked if she would need help getting unbuckled and if he could step in. I told him, “Sure.” He went over to her, told her she would need to unbuckle, then mimicked how to do it with his hands, respecting her dignity and allowing for independence. She then unbuckled herself and climbed out. She ran over with her fists in the air, calling out, “I did it, I did it,” while the whole line cheered and high-fived her. We would have never known and gotten to experience the joy or the independence had we not pushed down the fear and worry and let her soar.
So, if you need the reminder like I did, here it is: Don’t lower your expectations, just remove the timeline and what you assume success might look like. Presume competence; my gosh, our kids are so capable. Let yourself enjoy the victories and remind yourself of how far they have come. Mom or dad, you are doing a great job!
Shared by: Danielle Copello, Mom & Easterseals NECFL Pediatric Navigator