Level Up Your Confidence: Disabled Gamers Share Their Stories of Empowerment

Confidence is an important tool for any individual. It allows us to navigate the stressors of day-to-day living, form and join varying communities, and even give us the emotional strength to pursue new, frightening endeavors. For disabled people, confidence is not only beneficial, but at times necessary to survive and thrive in a world that still struggles to fully accept us.

Confidence constantly ebbs and flows depending on the situation or circumstance. There is no specific time to celebrate gaining confidence, nor should confidence be relegated to a singular moment. It's something that, once learned and understood, lasts a lifetime. Speaking with Easterseals, three members of the disability community explore what confidence means to them, especially through their advocacy.

Kristie Matheson

Advocate and content creator Kristie Matheson is no stranger to building and maintaining confidence. Whether slaying gargantuan beasts in the notoriously difficult video game Elden Ring or volunteering for local queer and disabled communities, Matheson regularly carries confidence throughout everything she does. Yet, her confidence is a trait she had to learn from a young age, especially with the help of her parents. According to Matheson, her confidence came from years of being part of programs for kids with disabilities. Her social nature meant that leaders in those programs would regularly ask her parents to have her “speak at events or become a poster child.” And now, as an adult, her confidence enables her to thrive in the advocacy space.

Now, Matheson attributes her confidence to her time serving on several local advocacy boards for the disability community. “These boards have allowed me to do numerous things such as to implement initiatives in programming and within policies and procedures, as well as speak on behalf of and for the disability community to the public,” Matheson said. These boards have my back no matter what I want to do, say, or receive backlash for.”

These positions fuel Matheson to become a better advocate. To properly serve her varying communities, she needs confidence to defend, protect, and advocate for different marginalized groups. Especially as a disabled individual, Matheson’s confidence is crucial to not only her personal morals and values, but also her work.

“Being both queer and disabled means I advocate for multiple communities,” she said. “Specifically, communities that are often [sidelined or misunderstood] or don't have rights at all. I have a privilege of being able to speak on behalf of these communities and feeling supported by those whose voices are unable to speak for themselves is part of what gives me that confidence to do what I do within both accessibility and queer spaces.”

Poppy Field

Poppy Field is an accessible consultant focusing on player experience and cognitive accessibility in the gaming industry, as well as a local organizer. From working on games like Sea of Thieves, to creating a club which provides a safe space for young, disabled women, Field is driven to champion underrepresented groups. The importance of community, as well as her experience as a disabled woman, allowed her to build confidence throughout her years of advocacy.

“I think a lot of my confidence comes from reframing the experience of disability as a very natural experience and human thing,” Field said. “From reframing that, I’ve been able to have more trust in myself, and my experiences, and what my community is experiencing. I’ve been able to build a self-assuredness in this space. You can have community around you to support and validate, but the hard truth is that you still must figure out confidence within yourself.”

Yet, despite the confidence gained through lived experiences, Field acknowledges it varies, ebbing and flowing depending on the situation. Her confidence presenting to dozens of developers differs compared to her confidence with organizing local events. And as mentioned previously, Field wants others, particularly disabled individuals, to understand that gaining and maintaining confidence will not be the result of what others say it should look like. Confidence is learned through growth and personal experiences. In turn, learning about herself and how she gained confidence ultimately brought joy into her life.

“Reclaiming confidence and that autonomy, in turn, is joy to me,” she said. “Joy doesn’t always have to be something like a birthday party. Disabled joy can be lying in bed eating take-away with your partner, or getting a text from a friend who you know has been sick recently but made time for you. Joy doesn’t need to be big gestures.”

Chris “DeafGamersTV” Robinson

Within the video game accessibility space, Chris “DeafGamersTV” Robinson is a fixture. Having worked as an accessibility consultant with AAA studios like Ubisoft, Xbox, and PlayStation, as well as being an advocate and active participant within the Fighting Game Community (FGC), Robinson regularly educates others on deaf and hard of hearing experiences. For him, his enjoyment of gaming, coupled with the communities he’s joined and built, allowed him to gain confidence throughout the years.

“Confidence to me isn't just about putting on a brave face, but to be able to allow yourself to reach out and connect with others,” Robinson said. “I used to be bullied a lot growing up, so gaming ended up being my escape from it. As I'm able to make friends with mutual interests in gaming, it was easier to not hide all the time. When I first got to college, I found more confidence in myself when I could truly connect with people.”

Robinson’s confidence is tangible, especially within the FGC. Not only has he made lifelong friendships, but he has also advocated for live captioning on gameplay streams, both digitally and in person, and convinced event organizers to provide ASL interpreters, even having the chance to act as one himself. And Robinson hosted his third annual Disabled Gaming League tournament for Street Fighter 6, exclusive to disabled competitors. All these accomplishments were directly tied to the confidence he built. These life events are what drive Robinson to continue his advocacy and build more confidence.

“I discovered how much I enjoyed [advocating],” he said. “And it's a huge part of building confidence throughout the years of being a gamer, streamer, content creator, advocate and gaming accessibility consultant. The fact that it can bring smiles to me is something I want people to pass on to others as well. My passion for gaming gave me the confidence I needed to connect with others so we can have fun together!”

Confidence is rarely something that can be taught. Obtaining it is a deeply personal journey, one that often comes with exciting highs and heartbreaking lows. For disabled people particularly, confidence can often be a necessity. It allows us to survive and thrive in spaces we’ve built or had the confidence to join. But more importantly, as Field explains, confidence, especially in the disabled community, is a shared trait. When we see other disabled people have confidence in their actions and decisions, it allows us to feel more confident in ourselves.

“Watching other disabled people be courageous and bold in expressing their experiences or emotions has always emboldened more confidence in me,” she said. “Oftentimes I’m looking at other disabled people like ‘Oh my goodness, they’re so confident sharing their stories,’ and I’ve had people say to me I’ve done the same for them. I really don’t think we realize how the act of sharing is confidence building for yourself and others around you.”